But with a little bit of luck – and if you choose your bridesmaids or maid of honour carefully – you’ll have hands-on help with your appearance just when you need it most. 

Traditionally the maid of honour is there to help with the selection of the bride’s dress, the selection of her own dress and those of the other bridesmaids.

But there’s more to it than just looking good in a posh frock, as even Pippa Middleton now knows.

A hard working chief assistant to the bride involves herself in many of the wedding preparations and on the day she is there to guide and keep in order the other bridesmaids, pages and flower girls. Normally, she will arrive outside the church ahead of the bride and wait to greet her and arrange her dress, veil and train. She will then follow the bride down the aisle, take her bouquet for the duration of the ceremony, help her put back her veil and then accompanies the best man to the vestry for the signing of the register. At the end of the ceremony, she will return the bouquet and walk back down the aisle on the best man’s left side.

As well as bringing added value to the bridal group photographs and witness to some of the biggest shopping trips in a girl’s life, today’s maid of honour also has to turn her hand to being chief organiser of the hen party with as much enthusiasm as the best man does the stag.

But she’s also got to be there as a sounding board, counsellor and most loyal supporter of the bride during the months and weeks of coping with those deeply stressful wedding plans. But as the bride’s ‘best friend’, she will really come into her own on the morning of the wedding.

From the moment she wakes up on that day, the bride has to re-set her mind and hand over control of the wedding. While she is getting ready, the maid of honour has to be her hands, voice and eyes, running errands, dealing with last minute thoughts or worries, delivering messages and keeping her environment calm and un-crowded with tact and diplomacy. The maid of honour may hear a last run through of the bride’s speech, or fill her in on any wedding morning gossip and news so that she doesn’t feel cut off, which can fuel anxiety. She will make the morning fun, reassure her that everything is running to plan, and keep the bride’s nerves at bay. During the day she will fulfil any of the traditional requirements and continue to ensure that the bride has everything she needs as well as keeping an eye on the bride’s hair and make-up.

So how do you make your choice?

As if you need to ask – it is what best friends and sisters are for, as long as you both agree on the specifics of the role.

If you have more than one sister, it can be tricky. Don’t just pick one unless there is very good reason (she’s the only one that is close to you in age or the only one who has not yet had the job).

Having more than one maid of honour, or none at all, is fine. You can either have a collection of bridesmaids to share the job or do away with the idea altogether and privately ask your best mate to be your right hand girl on the day.

She’ll still be flattered that you have asked her and you can give her a nice present in lieu of a dress. Importantly, don’t nominate a maid of honour on the basis that you think you should, or your mother insists, or someone is sulking. You will only regret it later.